My Beautiful Bomba Boys

In a postgame interview following a May 26th 7-0 shellacking of the lowly Chicago White Sox, Minnesota Twins outfielder Eddie Rosario gave a thoroughly scientific explanation of his in game adjustment to Dylan Covey changeups stating, “I hit a bomba.” Thus, the Bomba Squad was born. Boy have the Twins ever lived up to that nickname. Let's watch some taters:

The Twins went yard at a prodigious enough rate this season to become the first team ever to hit 300 long bombs and shatter the previous single season record of 267 home runs set just last season by the New York Yankees. All those dingers have helped propel the team to their first AL Central Division crown since 2010 and only third playoff appearance in the last 10 seasons.

It was a full squad effort as the Twinkies had an MLB record 5 players hit 30 or more home runs this season: DH Nelson Cruz (41), OF Max Kepler (36), 3B Miguel Sano (34), OF Eddie Rosario (32), and C Mitch Garver (31) who didn’t even crack 100 games played.

Fun fact, from 1988-2005 the Twins had exactly 0 players hit 30 home runs in a season. I was 13 years old before I saw a Twin hit 30 home runs; during the prime steroid era no less, when ball players looked like action figures.

In 1999, Jose Canseco hit 34 home runs for the Devil Rays and defended Castle Grayskull a half dozen times

This is a team that was so averse to the longball in my youth that they made future Hall of Famer, 6’3 230 lbs David Ortiz, Big Papi, he of 541 career home runs, slayer of Torii Hunter, “The biggest slap hitter you’ll ever see.”

Big Papi after receiving the bunt sign from Ron Gardenhire yet again

I have an anecdote burned in my brain that one time Ortiz was taking batting practice and depositing ball after ball into the upper deck of the Metrodome. Manager Tom Kelly witnessing the display, promptly came over to tell Big Papi to “knock it off” and work on hitting the ball to the opposite field. I haven’t been able to find a record of this story anywhere but I know deep in my soul this exchange occurred and I will forever keep it in the recesses of my mind next to memories of Lew Ford sacrifice bunting in the middle of the lineup.

The small ball culture of the Twins, ostensibly built around the ridiculously fast and bouncy playing surface they played on inside their long time inflatable home the Metrodome, somehow persisted through a new ballpark and deep into the last decade. The team’s previous manager, Paul Molitor, frequently clashed with his more analytics driven front office whomst begged him to stop giving up outs on purpose.

A video clip illustrating how bunts are perceived in the analytic community.

First base is traditionally a position a team likes to stick a burly man or chonky boy that can wallop homers but may be a defensive liability elsewhere. Far be it from me to besmirch the good name of my lord and savior Joseph Patrick Mauer, but he contributed a total of 24 home runs starting at that spot the previous 3 seasons combined. His 2019 replacement C.J. Cron, hit more dingers this season alone (25). Designated Hitter seems like a self-explanatory position on a lineup card where you would like to put, you know, a hitter, but for years the Twins have taken this spot to mean, where my 4th outfielder goes. Mixing things up this year, Nelson “Boomstick” Cruz was signed and inserted into that position, rewarding this adjustment by promptly stroking 41 dingers. Look at the majesty of these bombas:

Growing up one of my favorite Twins players was utility player Nick Punto. He was scrappy and could play just about any position on the field. Well in true Bomba Squad fashion, this team’s version of Nick Punto is at least 30 lbs heavier and twice as adorable. I speak of course of Willians Astudillo, La Tortuga. The plucky Venezuelan has played 6 different positions for the team across 57 games and for my money, made the catch of the year.

Does he sometimes forget which of his many positions he’s playing to hilarious and heartwarming results? You bet your burro he does.

These new faces and new approach to the game were championed by first year manager and all time cool name haver Rocco Baldelli, who finally introduced the organization to a fact Greg Maddux and Tom Glavine learned 20 years ago.

While previous Twins coaching staffs have focused on moving a runner from first to third with a well executed hit and run, Baldelli and the Bomba Squad have embraced the fact that you can also move that runner from first to home by launching the ball directly into orbit.

Why am I spending so much time talking up how the Bomba Squad is different from Twins teams of yore? Because we’re playing the god damn Yankees again. Advancing past the Bronx Bombers has been a Sisyphean task for the grind it out small ball Twins I’ve known all my life. A $200 million dollar boulder blocking their climb to triumph and joy. In fact, of the Twins 7 appearances in the postseason since 2000, they have faced the Yankees 5 times, been eliminated by them all 5 times and gone a combined 2-13.

If you add some Cheetos dust to those fingers, you have an accurate depiction of me on my couch watching Derek Jeter shatter my hopes and dreams year in and year out

I have to somehow convince myself this year is going to be different from 2003 and 2004 and 2009 and 2010 and also 2017. Unfortunately the current starting rotation only has two guys I trust more than Boof Bonser, the bullpen gives me nightmares, and the defensive X factor is out for the season with a shoulder injury. By God if this team is going to be the one to finally climb the mountain, the bombas are how they’re gonna do it. This Twins team isn’t built to all band together and push a boulder at all. The Bomba Squad is built to blow that rock into a million pieces and hit the fragments to adoring fans up in the third deck.

This year will be different. Yes the Twins are going to the city that never lets me sleep, but they’re taking a whole squad full of Alfred Delia’s with ‘em.

I like our chances.